Just say you don’t wanna stop eating meat

Ask any vegan and–after informing you that they are, in fact, a vegan– they’ll probably agree on the unmatched entertainment listening to anti-vegan excuses brings.

The creativity and effort expended by those who are avoiding the simplicity of stating “I just don’t wanna stop eating meat” creates a conversation that’s hard to resist. Whether they are motivated by a weight of guilt or the pleasure of debate, these people come up with the wildest shit.

I’ve had someone tell me they needed meat because their medication required it. Another once claimed veganism is impossible because plants are fertilized with cow manure. From vegetables apparently being sentient, to soy allergies leading to a lifetime of five recipes; these arguments aren’t just being drawn for the sake of self assurance, rather end up denouncing veganism as an entirety.

It’s “veganism is too expensive” rather “I can’t afford a vegan lifestyle”.

Or saying “veganism makes you an asshole”, instead of “the vegans I’ve encountered turned me off to the whole damn thing”.

They’re used to distance oneself, deflecting hypothetical blame with hypothetical exceptions.

“Some people need meat to survive.” I mean…okay, maybe, but are you one of them?

“What about those who are allergic to nuts and soy?” There are resources for those with restrictions; are you one of them?

“Not everyone can afford it!” Got it. What about your circumstances?

“Certain cultures revolve heavily around hunting you know.” Very true! Does yours?


“It can make people with EDs relapse.” Unfortunately, yes. It can also promote their recovery! Is that your business?

There are a lot of reasons people stay eating meat. Whether they’ve a family to feed, a controlling roof, a hectic schedule, or a demanding ailment. I’m no one to expect an explanation, and they’re under no obligation to provide one. It is what it is.

Even if it’s just not giving a shit.

Of course I’d prefer everyone to quit eating the flesh and drinking the tit pus of an animal, but there are those who simply lack the concern or motivation to do so. I can (and sometimes do) sit here all day, list source after source explaining the seemingly endless list of detrimental effects caused by animal agriculture, and that still wouldn’t change the mind of a person who ain’t care. Apathy is as abundant as greenhouse gas emissions from the livestock industry, smfh…. Pushing awareness and sharing resources can only go so far. The personal initiative of another ain’t an appropriate– or successful– talking point.

That’s honest! Slightly pessimistic and slick frustrating, but honest nonetheless!

If we’re “debating” whether veganism is doable or not (as if there aren’t vegans who, ya know, ain’t dead), I’d rather you just tell me straight up you don’t care than shove shit my way.

Just say you don’t wanna stop eating meat.

Don’t try and tell me cutting a tomato off it’s vine is the same thing as ripping apart a cow. Don’t push your bible my way, citing a God that thinks beings are here for our benefit. Don’t even think about pulling up some Reddit thread that told you veganism is stealing food from “third world people” I swear…

Just say you like meat! Or that you don’t care! I’m not your momma. I sure as shit ain’t someone who has any right to condemn you. What you do and don’t do is your deal. Those are your finances to manage and your fridge to pack.

Sure, you may end up continuing to support the exploitation of the environment/people/animals/local economies/etc. BUT I DIGRESS! It’s your deal. Quit with the scapegoats, please. Stop using other people’s real struggles as tools to push against some agenda you’ve developed a personal vendetta against. Vegans, quite literally, just want the world to be a better place. There are a lot of them who fit the pretentious asshole trope to the T, but that doesn’t necessarily mean the movement and lifestyle as a whole should suffer.

Select shitty people don’t represent something so big, and certain excuses aren’t universally applicable.

Just say you don’t wanna quit. We all got an area where our empathy just doesn’t reach (yet). Maybe with time, or money, or exposure you’ll sway. ‘Till then there’s just really not anywhere we can go. Why waste the time between then coming up with the most outrageous lies?

Boy, I’m a vegan even in your fantasy of me being lost in the woods for thirteen days with a fully loaded rifle and a group of orphaned bears conveniently napping a hundred feet away. And you’re still someone who won’t drop dead by eating beans instead of beef. Take a seat.


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  • Reply
    September 4, 2017 at 1:07 PM

    Yes I love this!! Your writing is a dream. One time my ex-boyfriend’s mom told me she couldn’t be vegetarian or vegan because “plant proteins don’t have amimo acids” Clearly she didn’t understand basic biology.

  • Reply
    September 4, 2017 at 1:05 PM

    Yesss I love this! Your writing is a dream! My ex-boyfriend’s mom said she can’t eat a veggie diet because the proteins in veggie products don’t have amino acids. Like,, how are there proteins then? Clearly she didn’t understand basic biology

  • Reply
    July 14, 2016 at 3:34 PM

    OMG THE FANTASIES! “What if you’re on an island with literally NO plants, nothing but animals?” Muffucker what do you think the animals are eating? This post is hilarious ❤

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